I Feel Stabby

Something that you should probably know, if you didn’t, is that I am a Mother Bear when it comes to taking care of the people I love.  A short-tempered, take no prisoners, battle to death Mama Bear.  I will take on anyone, anywhere and anytime to make sure that they get what is the best for them.

While I can have a very difficult time standing up for myself I have no such issues standing up for my kids or for Edward.  I’m pretty sure it would be true for Edward’s kids and the grandkids too but I haven’t been called upon to turn into Amy the Wicked Witch Of The West for them yet.

I remember the first time my son saw me go to battle for him.  His school was trying to throw a stupid, burocratic roadblock in the way of his education……basically he couldn’t change from his alternative school back to regular high school (at his request) until they had a ‘meeting’ and they couldn’t schedule the ‘meeting’ until school had been in session for 10 days.    So when I pointed out that it made ZERO sense that he should miss the first 10 days of school until they had a ‘meeting’ (Said complete with air quotes and sarcastic tone) the look on his face was priceless.  (I won the argument, not that I’m keeping score…..)

For Apple-Lite my favorite was when I had a complete freakout on the Principal and Assistant Principal over the definition of ‘a couple’.  (This is quite frankly my favorite stupid argument of all time.  How many is ‘a couple of days’?   If you answered 2 then you agreed with me.  The schools position was that ‘a couple of days’ could reasonably mean anything between 2 and 5 apparently while I disagreed pretty passionately.  (I wasn’t sweet in this argument….. I didn’t win that argument but I did win the war.)

Fasting forward to about 10 minutes ago.  I have been at the hospital with Edward for 33 of the last 36 hours.  My plan was to get him happily settled in and asleep and then slip home about midnight or 1 am and sleep in my own bed for a couple of hours and be back here by 5 am or so.  I was really looking forward to it.   I’m tired and honestly, I’m getting irrationally stabby at everyone except Edward.

Until the new night nurse arrived with Edward’s 10 pm pain meds (at 10:15 not that I’m keeping count).  She then happily said that she wouldn’t come and wake Edward up at 2:15 with his meds since they were to be given ‘as needed’ not ‘as scheduled’.  When he woke up he could ask for them. (Oh but we are happy as clams to wake him up whenever to check his vitals or stick his fingers or give him insulin…..)

Back the cart up…..WHAT?

I sweetly (honest to God I was sweet.  No really I was) pointed out that was not acceptable.  That we had shifted him off the morphine pump (which is still an option for him) to oral meds because they provided a more regular stable level of pain control and (for the love of GOD) he had his hip replaced so he had pain.  I did not want to wait until he woke up in pain and then be put in the position of having to hurt for 30 minutes until the drugs kicked in OR putting him back on the morphine pump which has more significant side effects with his breathing.  That pain control was of primary importance because pain limits his ability to move which starts a vicious cycle of potential side effects.  That if we were on day 4 post surgery it would be a completely different conversation but we aren’t even out 48 hours yet.

Don’t fuck with Ed’s pain meds.

Nurse Betty said she was willing to concede my point.

But now I don’t trust her and I can’t trust that she will show up with the appropriate medication at 2:15 or 3 or whenever.  And hand to God if I go home and come back in here at 5 am and Edward is in pain I can not be held responsible for my actions.  So I either have to stay until after the 2 pm meds and then get back here before the 6 am ones or I stay the night.

Fuck.

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Categories: Uncategorized | 1 Comment

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One thought on “I Feel Stabby

  1. Kicky

    I love you both.

    Amy, you are a great advocate.

    Ed, darling, heal fast! So I can sit in your lap again.. *grin*

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